I heard a priceless story about revenge one time. A woman asked her husband one morning to zip up the back of her dress. He began to play around with the zipper in a flirtatious way—zipping it up and down, up and down—and in the process, the zipper broke. She had just [...]
There was no manipulation whatsoever in the scene in Song of Solomon 5:6-8. There was no bargaining—“you do this for me and I’ll do that for you.” Bargaining results in manipulation, not ministry.
A woman asked me after I had presented the information in this chapter, “If I can’t leave him, can I kill him? No, [...]
Early in our marriage, my wife was lying in bed one morning, and I said, “Teresa, get up and fix me some breakfast!” I was teasing her, but my words didn’t exactly come out in the teasing way that I meant for them to sound. At the same time I spoke those words, I picked [...]
Let’s continue from last week’s discussion about Peter’s charge concerning how we act in conflict. Such an attitude and means of resolving conflict begin with how you individually choose to respond to a situation. Will you allow your hurt to linger, fester, and grow, or will you give it to the Lord, ask [...]
In 1 Peter 3:1, 3-4, 7-8, Peter taught:
Wives, likewise, be submissive to your own husbands…Do not let your adornment be merely outward…rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God…Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with [...]
A Continued Pursuit in Love
Continuing from last weeks thoughts, how do they square with my earlier advice that you not let certain things build up inside you until you feel an explosion coming on? Very easily. It is up to you to give weight to a situation or circumstance that you perceive [...]
Solomon did not at first respond to his wife’s rejection in an angry way. He persisted in expressing his desire. At first he only called to her. She heard his voice. Then even after she had rejected him verbally, he reached out for her. His behavior did not mirror hers. [...]
Last week we left our discussion with being slow to anger and not reacting like the person who has hurt you so that you resolve your conflict. Maybe you are saying, “But you said previously, Tommy, that I should not stifle my feelings and that I should express them freely in my marriage.” That’s absolutely [...]
Two weeks ago we left Solomon knocking at the door of his beloveds and where she was not letting him in. He persists in his expression of desire and longing for her:
My beloved put his hand by the latch of the door, and my heart yearned for him. I arose to open for my beloved, [...]
As we continue our series on conflict, what an opportunity many of us will have this Christmas. Yes, we all know family is a blessing and wonderful, but quite honestly, most of us know it can be very stressful as well.
Here are a couple of reminders as we enter what should be restful, [...]
Conflict occurs when both parties feel in some way wronged, denied, misunderstood, or unappreciated. We find a perfect example in the conflict between Solomon and his bride:
I sleep, but my heart is awake; It is the voice of my beloved!
He knocks, saying, “Open for me, my sister, my love, my dove, my perfect one;
For my [...]
The inevitability of conflict is addressed in the Song of Solomon. Nearly two chapters are devoted to a “fight” between Solomon and his bride. The result of the conflict was a deeper and better marriage, and therefore, we are going to take a close look at the six stages of their conflict.
Stage One: Both Parties [...]
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