There was no manipulation whatsoever in the scene in Song of Solomon 5:6-8. There was no bargaining—“you do this for me and I’ll do that for you.” Bargaining results in manipulation, not ministry.
A woman asked me after I had presented the information in this chapter, “If I can’t leave him, can I kill him? No, you can’t do that either!
But you can continue to love your spouse and to pray for your spouse. Ask God to do what you cannot do, and that is to change the human heart and transform the human mind.
State what you feel you must state, make whatever requests you believe are right to make, put forth your case as best you can make it, but don’t attempt to force a change in your mate. Leave that up to God.
My Question For You: Is there something that you want to change in your spouse (or maybe something your spouse wants to change in you)?
My Challenge For You: Leave the changing part up to God.
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I trust God with everything and yet I am struggling with this. The hardest thing for me to do is to live with the unhappiness while waiting for a change. How do I keep a smile on my face?
Rachel,
You have to remember the manifold wisdom of God. Whilst Joseph was imprisoned in his innocence, his truth still came out. His greatness could not be imprisoned. Your brilliance cannot be ignored either. We live in the realm of time and it takes time for our truth to shine. Whilst we are waiting on God to answer, He takes us through much else to refine us. Your dilemma is not unique. God has manifold ways of dealing with us.
A great answer always comes from a great challenge. And remember Joseph’s jail time was not a wasted period. He became promoted greatly afterward. Without it, he would not have became who he was destined for.
What you are going through is God’s tool for you.