Conflict Series (Part 9): Resolution to Both Parties Feel Harmed

At the end of December, we were discussing how both Solomon and his bride were feeling wronged by a conflict they were having. This is the time when a conflict can most easily be resolved.

How? You can determine that you do not need to react as your mate has reacted. If your mate has hurt you, you do not need to hurt your mate. Whatever your mate has done to you, you do not need to respond in kind. The apostle Paul stated it this way: “See that no one renders evil for evil to anyone, but always pursue what is good both for yourselves and for all.” (I Thess. 5:15)

You do not have to reciprocate or mirror what others do to you or say about you. Your mother probably taught this principle to you in the way my mother taught me: “Two wrongs do not make a right.”

Your response is subject to your will. You do not need to be hateful, angry, or cruel to a person who hurts you. You can respond with the love and patience of the Spirit of God rather than the revengeful and impatient spirit of man.

Strife begins at the point when you allow yourself to have hurt feelings and then you choose to nurse that hurt and wallow in it. Proverbs speaks often on this subject:

A wrathful man stirs up strife, but he who is slow to anger allays contention. (Proverbs 15:18)

More next week on how to work through conflict.

My Question For You:

Is your first response when you are hurt to try and hurt your spouse back or do you respond with love and patience?

My Challenge For You:

Consider the wisdom from Proverbs above and be slow to anger – it will be to your benefit.

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